Unease
by Lauren Nachtyr
Summary: Sorting emotions never proves easy for teenagers, and Walter is without exception. The young servant of Hellsing is forced to reflect on Alucard's perception of him.


A door slammed shut loudly as feet shuffled on hardwood floors. The sound of footsteps fell silent as a dark-haired boy lay upon his bed, kicking off a pair of black dress shoes. Resent boiled wildly within the young servant's body as he tried to calm himself. Letting a breath go, Walter Dornez began to sort his jumbled thoughts, hoping to lessen his stress.

_That lout! _He thought exasperatedly. _How dare he! _Rolling onto his stomach, the butler attempted to hide his face from the rest of the room, hoping to quell a sudden burst of embarrassment in remembrance to events earlier that day.

Since his release in Warsaw of 1944, Alucard made it routine to pursue the Angel of Death as he performed various duties as the head butler. Walter was a significant source of entertainment to the centuries-old vampire, much to the teenager's dismay. Alucard began with verbal assaults to fuel his partner's temper; remarks packed with carefully worded insults proved to be the best fodder.

In this recent time of peace, however, Alucard found his old game strategy needed an upgrade. Adding a physical element to his approach proved to be more effective than any words the nosferatu could ever speak. Consequently, stirring Walter's hormones became Alucard's favorite pastime.

On this occasion in particular, the vampire had allowed his hands to travel further south than Walter had expected, and, in Arthur's study no less. As his face colored to a brilliant shade of red, Walter felt that his control would not hold out, and fled to the confines of his room. As much as he enjoyed those tempting fingers, he would not allow himself to willingly revel in their allure.

Walter turned onto his backside once again, holding his dominant hand up towards the light fixture suspended from the ceiling. Since entering his room, he felt calmer. Thoughts that had started to wonder what Alucard found so amusing about him transformed into confusion and curiosity for his vampiric partner.

_How can his touch be so..._Walter's chest felt tight in that moment as he looked to his dominant hand. _My fingers and his fingers...how can they be so different?_

The youthful servant knew quite well the physical differences between his and Alucard's hands. Walter was lively with warmth while his partner was icy and lifeless. His hands were far smaller than Alucard's, whose fingertips could curl around the tops of the butler's if each placed their palms together.

That however, only applied to Alucard's taller form. In the past few weeks, he had taken on that appearance more than his feminine guise in the hopes of riling Walter. It had, unfortunately, worked like a charm.

Casting off thoughts of the recently taller, broader and masculine Alucard, Walter began to wonder how his partner could infuriate him so thoroughly. It wasn't only the irritation, but that combined with the vampire's natural allure that left Hellsing's butler weak in the knees like a schoolgirl.

It had all started with those cold, vampiric hands; it was quite hard for Walter to comprehend the magic Alucard's hands possessed. Those long, silken fingers were capable of eliciting such raw pleasure with the gentlest touch.

Likewise, those same hands could serve as the vampire's only weapon on the battlefield, able to impale any enemy through the chest, breaking ribs, destroying vital organs and ultimately shattering vertebrae as if they were glass.

It proved that Alucard was not only strong, but held great patience; he knew when and how to exert and contain his power. Though, such feats were still beyond Walter's conscious. Making love and murder were not synonymous tasks, but somehow each was performed with immense precision and care.

Making love...it was something Walter had trouble contemplating. _Love..._he scoffed at the word, face reddening. What the nosferatu did to Walter could hardly be labeled with a word as delicate as love. Ravage was far more fitting.

Closing his deep azure eyes, the young servant of Hellsing allowing himself a few small thoughts of his partner: of cool hands gliding effortlessly over heated skin, fingertips massaging his nether regions beautifully, leaving the teenager begging for more. Walter shuddered at such a thought, a dull throb starting in his groin. It was hard to believe that Alucard could affect him so deeply.

_Alucard..._his mind whispered. He allowed his thoughts to drift, recalling photographic scenes of Alucard atop him.

_Oh come now, Walter. Are you really going to deny yourself such pleasure?_ A voice cooed softly, effectively disrupting his thoughts.

"A-Alucard..." he said voice somewhat shaky. "I-I shouldn't be surprised that you're here...but do you mind? I would prefer to be left alone." Walter sat up, looking towards the door to his quarters. Soon enough, the petit vampire solidified as he passed through the wall like an apparition.

"Oh but that's no fun at all. What am I to do when my dear Angel is away?" Alucard made his way over to the youthful servant, coming to stand in front of him. He extended his small, child-sized hand out to grasp Walter's chin, holding it between his thumb and middle finger.

Deep red eyes peered down at his partner, looking him over like one would a fine jewel, taking in every detail. "Why so annoyed?" he asked, grinning.

Walter was certain his eyes were lying. His expression was irate, mouth turned down in a deep frown. His piercing cobalt eyes were somehow softer than his face, half-lidded now.

Alucard knew what that look meant. _Oh Angel..._he spoke mentally, his words reaching Walter's mind. _Your mouth says no, but you're eyes are saying yes. Why would you run, when I can tell you're so wanting?_

Eyes grew narrow as Walter looked on at his partner. He didn't want to get used to Alucard doing as he pleased, using Walter's body for his own mischievous purposes. No...In all honesty, it wasn't that.

The issue was that he didn't want to admit that he wanted it, to be used in this way, to be ravaged, to be consumed by his sensual partner. It was not something he could admit.

_Angel..._whispered Alucard's mind.

Walter snapped back to reality, growling softly under his breath. It was hard to focus when Alucard was touching him. Even through those thick, white gloves, he could feel the cold sensation of dead fingers upon his chin. As cool and lifeless as those appendages were, they held a certain allure, one Walter could not fight against.

_So that is your issue, my dear Angel of Death. You want to preserve your pride and not admit you crave this...my touch, hn?_

Walter's eyes went wide. He slapped Alucard's hand away, gritting his teeth. "How dare you! How dare you read my thoughts!"

Alucard stood back, folding arms over his chest. He listened a moment, then closed his eyes, thinking to himself. Opening those large, red eyes again, he moved towards Walter, looking down at him. "So childish...you should already know that you're an open book whether I hear your thoughts or not. You're so easy to read," he said with an impish glint in his eye.

_Childish? _Walter breathed in slowly. Despite his age, he had his pride to consider, and acting in this manner was quite immature. This behavior had gone on long enough, and his expression softened as a result. "Whether I act in such a manner or not is none of your concern. You should be mindful of your own actions."

Alucard blinked once. His smirk softened to a small grin as he moved to sit at the butler's side on the bedspread. "Is that all you have to say?"

"...I-I suppose..." answered Walter, caught off guard by such a gently spoken question. He relaxed his shoulders, turning towards his partner with a confused look on his face.

The smirk found its way back to Alucard's lips. In one deft movement, he'd closed the distant between himself and the youth before him, sealing their lips in a heated kiss. Lips locked, and then parted about a centimeter's distance apart. Like magnets, the two molded together again, Alucard's snake-like tongue moving past the barriers of their lips, caressing Walter's warm muscle.

He groaned as gentle as possible into Alucard's mouth, hands gripping the bed sheets below. There was no turning back at this point; with just one kiss Alucard has placed a spell on the butler. His mind was clouded by the euphoria of such a kiss, those small, feminine lips formed around his own, urging him to continue.

_Don't think Angel...just feel. Feel what I am giving you._

Whatever anger had been in Walter had all but dispelled by this point, replaced with lust. He listened to Alucard's request and complied, reveling in the sensations running through his body.

Sometime between the kiss and the present, Walter found himself lying stark naked lengthwise on his bed. Alucard's mouth hovered over his hips, taking the butler's dripping manhood in, sucking quickly and thoroughly.

"Ghaaaah...mmm..."

"Yes, Angel..." said Alucard, taking a moment to speak between licks. "Is it good? Tell me..." One ungloved hand trailed down the youth's chest, past his abdomen, stopping at the juncture between his need and bellybutton. "Tell me that you like it...I want to know..."

Eyes knit together. "Mmm...gah...it's good...don't stop, please..."

The vampire cooed, continuing his actions.

_H-How can this be? _Walter thought through his fogged mind. Somehow, unbeknownst to him, he was still able to think, even with his partner's head between his legs. _How is it that...now I don't care...I don't mind him doing this to me? _

Walter cracked an eye open, looking between his legs.

Long raven hair cascaded over pale, thin shoulders. Alucard's head bobbed against the butler's hip, hands holding the shaft in place as the vampire worked his mouth over the desire, tongue twirling rhythmically over the moist slit.

Alucard in this form left a comfortable feeling in Walter. There was never a time that he felt 100% comfortable with his partner or for that matter anyone at all. But of all the people the boy knew, Alucard was the closest.

There was something about this girlish appearance that broke down Walter's defenses. He felt...somehow...that it was ok to relinquish his body to this being, that everything would be fine if he trusted in the centuries-old vampire.

That phrase alone scared Walter. Trust...a vampire? He was Hellsing's Trash man, a vampire hunter, the Angel of Death. Where was it said that one could 'trust' a vampire? There was just something about Alucard that broke through those walls and encircled his mind.

For now, he thought, it was best not to think. Alucard wanted him to feel, and so he did.

"Haaa..." he moaned, hips bucking forward into that moist, inviting mouth.

_Yes Walter...leave your thoughts behind. Submit to your desires. _Pulling back, Alucard let the stiff member fall from his lips, sitting back on his knees a moment. He gazed down at the boy writhing on the bed, taking great pleasure in the fact that Walter was starting to understand.

He wanted him to leave his cares behind and to get past himself. He wanted him to experience this pleasure without inhibition. "Seems you're ready now..." he said as the shadows in the room began to gravitate towards his small form. The shadows coiled around the tiny vampire, circling about him for a moment until they dispelled, returning to their former positions.

Walter peered out through lust-filled eyes, his stomach churning uneasily as the fog in his mind began to clear.

Before the butler knelt the taller form of Alucard. The long strands of uniform hair were replaced with a shaggier mop, one side covering half of his face. Thicker looking skin stretched over defined muscles of the much larger frame Alucard now possessed. The only similarity was his eyes, still just as wild, gleaming down at the butler.

"So, Walter," his baritone voice spoke. "Are you ready for me?"

He felt his back stiffen, gazing into the deep crimson eyes that met his own. Unsurely he nodded, not willing to hesitate at this point. Walter attempted to relax as he felt that same tongue from before enter him, readying his body for the climax of their fun.

_What's wrong with me now...?_ he thought, eyes darting away from the vampire. He couldn't bring himself to look at his partner and shut his eyes, face coloring as a result.

There was something about this form that was unsettling to Walter. He couldn't quite place his finger on it, but something about it made him shy away. Walter began to wonder what his issue was. For one, it wasn't that Alucard was any less appealing. _God no..._he thought.

If possible, Alucard was more enticing, much sexier than before. His body was longer, sculpted and taunt. In this form he had a much angular face with high cheek bones, which complemented the large grins the vampire liked to brandish.

Or maybe...no. It wasn't that Alucard was sexier in this form, but, perhaps that it was presented in a different fashion. Overall, his smaller petite form was perceived as innocent, cute and possibly Lolita.

Though the other form was seen as cute, Alucard's larger figure was the epitome of masculine sexuality. Taunt muscles, mysterious eyes, thick hair...if this were what he looked like when he was human, Walter hypothesized that he was a lady killer in his day.

But all these notions were aside the point. Walter groaned loudly as the slick tongue left his body, his penis pulsing, throbbing terribly against his belly. He couldn't bring himself to open his eyes and look at the man sure to be staring down at him.

"Are you ready?" he asked, propping the butler's heels on his shoulders.

Walter nodded, shivering in anticipation. He felt himself stretch as the tip entered him. _Gods...he so big... _A new feeling came over Walter as he felt Alucard push into him slowly. Eyes closed tight as he felt a few drops of saliva escape his lips as the pain began to fizzle out. The pleasure replacing it was exquisite.

_What's wrong with me..._thought Walter. _It's so good...yet I still can't shake this feeling. _

Suddenly a new thought came to mind. While he loved the naughty things Alucard did to him, he felt completely embarrassed with this form. It was that commanding appearance he assumed, that dominated the 14 year old so easily.

Though it wasn't only that...it was that fact combined with the feeling of being an object, only a toy to be played with when Alucard was bored. It was true that Walter was a source of amusement for the vampire, but in his smaller, white form, there was...something there, something more between them.

Walter thought it similar to love, but love was hardly the correct word. All he knew is there was something...more between them.

Now, in this bigger form, Walter felt nothing but regret and unease. He wanted so desperately to have the same reassurance with this form; but it just wasn't the same. He felt ashamed showing his pleasure-contorted face, or allowing himself to moan as loud as he wanted, so he quieted himself and shut his eyes.

_Walter...look at me..._

The teenager's lips wrinkled. It was hard to remember that Alucard could hear all of his thoughts as if he were speaking.

Completely exposed now, blue eyes opened to look down at the vampire. He was fully sheathed with the butler's orifice, arms bent at the elbow on either side of Walter's shoulders. Crimson eyes were half-lidded, locked on his own. "W-Walter..." he breathed.

_I...I really hope that..._ Walter clasped his arms around the back of his partner's neck, closing any gaps between their bodies. He moved feverantly into his lover, hips bucking with a renewed vigor. "A-Alucard...hmm...ahh..."

The larger vampire tensed with a husky growl, releasing his cool seed into the youth.

Shortly after, Walter felt the beginnings of his own orgasm, nails dragging along the broad, strong shoulders at his fingertips. _Alucard..._his mind murmured. _I hope that...I'm more to you than that...Don't cast me aside. I'm not just a play-thing. I'm...human, too._


End file.
